What if?

You are an alien visitor to earth. Or maybe just a teenage boy wanting to broaden his horizons.
You want to learn more about the mystery of women.
An obvious way to do this might be to watch some t.v.
You quickly become aware that these creatures seem to spend vast amounts of time in supermarkets staring at the ingredients labels on food packaging, shopping, dieting and worrying not only about their appearance,and how they smell but about all things related to their nether regions.
You boggle at the adverts for something called 'stool softeners,' and wonder why women would need these on a regular basis. On the other hand they also seem to wrestle with being both constantly constipated and 'fluid' - maybe even at the same time.
Then, just as you thought it couldnt get any worse, you are introduced to the concept that most women seem to have problems with bladder control, and buy nappy liners so that they can fall about laughing without worrying about the accident they are about to have.
You are baffled by the adverts for cosmetics containing ingredients no one has ever heard of (hydraproxilane - retinol A - pentapeptides) and you presume that women are either supposed to be (a) so intelligent as to know immediately what these things are, or (b) so thick they wont ask!
Either way, you quickly get the impression that buying tubs of cosmetic polyfiller and painting masks of thin plasticised gel on their faces - supposedly to get rid of the effects of ageing - is an everyday part of the beauty routine of girls who only look about fourteen in the commercials.
You then perhaps, could be forgiven for giving women a wide berth until you are old and senile and incontinent enough to need all the products that they do!

www.thinkbuddha.org

Great idea for an answer to the religious advertising placards being pasted onto various buses around the country.
The Madhyamaka bus would have the following on it:
'Neither an entity nor a nonentity moves in any of the three ways. So motion, bus and route are nonexistent'.
Something to ponder on!